And Jesus Wept…
April 4, 2019
Compassionately, I sat as I heard yet a woman’s journey (as I do many) of horrific and painful childhood physical and emotional abuse. It didn’t take much time for her story to penetrate to the deep places of my heart. The manipulation and control in her life by the hands of her family was trauma that no person should ever have to endure from an enemy - let alone from the very people that were meant to hold, protect cherish and nourish her as a child.
I am sullen and almost speechless. I have no doubt in my heart or mind that God will free her as he is already starting to and I delight in being a part of that healing journey. But right now, my heart is still heavy and trying to find words for what it feels, but there are none- just tears. I am reminded of one Bible verse from Mark- it is from the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead, and the story states … “Jesus Wept”
If I wanted to, I could ponder why Jesus waited four days to raise Lazarus from the dead in this story or even why he waited so long to heal this women of past physical and emotional abuse. I can ponder why he sent Martha away (but not Mary) upon exclaiming in her anger “Why Lord?” “you could have saved Him!” ..I can ponder why Jesus wasn’t there in the first place- But most of all- right now- It hits me that Jesus arrived at the house and saw 2 of his best friends Mary and Martha, grieving, and out of compassion he felt for his grieving friends, he was moved to tears….
And today, though I know that Jesus is also freeing this women from her present places in her heart long stuck in emotional abuse, trauma, shock and fear - I consider it a privilege to sit here with her in that pain and pray for her, carrying her wounds to Jesus - and as I do, I feel them too. I weep as Jesus did with Mary and Martha.
You may have endured similar physical or emotional abuse, similar family assaults and trauma and don’t know where to turn. I want to assure you - there is Jesus who heals and also weeps for you. You are beautiful, you did not deserve this, and it didn’t come at the hand of some abusive God because he wanted you punished. He loves you and He weeps….
So my friend, below is both a blessing and prayer for your trauma, your emotional scars left by abuse, your hurt from physical battering …please find a quiet place to sit and soak this in as I bless your heart and pray for you
Sister or Brother in Christ, I speak to your heart today as a son or daughter of the Most High God, - I bless you in Jesus name that you would know you are deeply loved and cared for - you are not a mistake , you are not a misfit, or garbage, you are not worth abusing or hurting - you are glorious and beautiful. You are welcomed into this world and celebrated to be yourself in every aspect of your being and in all who you are. You are incredible and have so much to offer. You have been made so wonderfully and whatever has happened in the past abuse...you were made for so much more. it is not your fault. Whatever you went through as a child, It was not your fault… the abuse, the anger you endured, the hurt you stuffed deep inside, the words that were spoken over you, the pain that you still feel…it is NOT your fault. But there have been lies written on your heart, and I speak to your heart to say they are not true. You are cherished by a God who gave his life for you. You are beautiful and the enemy knows who you are and fears you.
Precious Child of God, you were made for love and to be loved- you are worthy to be loved. You were made for relationship, but were deeply hurt by the very people that were meant to give you that relationship. And that was wrong… and you may at some point need to forgive, but right now, just want to say that you did not deserve the abandonment, the punishment, it was unjust, it was wrong and it was NOT your fault. So I pray….
Lord Jesus,
I pray for this precious child of yours that you would come and wrap your arms of love and breath your life into his or her heart today. I ask you to hold this person's heart in all the places where he or she didn’t know where to go or where to turn . As a perfect loving father speak to the innermost being- and tell them that you are here and will never leave or forsake them.
I ask you Lord Jesus that you take all the trauma , all the pain , all the fear , all shock and horror that that this person has experienced and draw it to your cross. Every time she felt “dissed” , shamed, broken, a nothing, worthless, abused, unworthy, worthy only to be abused or abandoned…. take it and draw it to your feet. I pray for the pain that is so buried deep inside that you would take it and put it on yourslef. I ask that you go to the caverns of this person's heart today and remove the shame and dread and any assignment that was holding it in place.
Lord Jesus, Wash all the places where fear and shame have been and put love and forgiveness, love, beauty and peace in its place . Where they have been fearful that it will happen again, I ask that you bring a resting place to that part of their heart that has never been there and we ask the enemy to leave now. By the power of your love hold their heart and allow them to open it once again to the people who are safe and give wisdom to know who is. If there were tears that were never shed , allow them to grieve and trust again, or if there is weeping and grief that doesn’t feel like it will ever end, place your heart of love and dry their tears.
2 Chronicles 16:9 says that you will strongly support those whose hearts are completely yours, and I ask Lord Jesus that you would come and remember your words and strongly support your child today!
I pray that in every place where fear, and trauma laid its root and kept her in the place of reliving the truama that it would go now in Jesus Name. That you would place love in its place.
In Jesus Name...Amen
stay tuned for more ….